The sun has just started to get through the trees. The view from my solitary cabin is beautiful. That’s exactly why I selected it, five years ago. Solitary and beautiful.
I’m drinking my first coffee of the day, comfortably wrapped up in my checkered dressing gown, when the black helicopter noisily lands into my backyard in a cloud of dust. Three men in dark suits and shining aviator sunglasses come out of it. They keep their heads down, the propeller is still turning. Do they really assume that engineers were dumb enough to position the heli props at a head chopping height? CIA morons, I think.
A familiar silhouette walks in front, the other two seem just busy to watch his back. He knocks at my kitchen door. I’m not in a hurry, I exactly know who he is and what he wants from me. He sketches an uneasy grin as my face appears behind the mosquito grid.
“Hey, Heavy! Glad to see you old crook! You look in shape, even if you’d need a good shaving. May I get in?”
“Thomas J. Thompson… I told you I didn’t want to see your dirty mug around anymore. Tell your guys to clear off my backyard right away or I’ll take delight in shooting into your legs and your fucking eggbeater.” I gently lift my right hand, my .44 Remington shines like gold in the morning light.
“C’mon, Heavy! Ok, I am sorry for the Mosul thing, we shouldn’t have dumped you. But you knew the risks and… Well, whatever, we need you back into service, the President needs you. Come with me now, I will tell y…”
I feel confused. I suddenly realize that I’ve never had a backyard or a gun. Or a checkered dressing gown, either. I hear the speaker’s voice coming out of my radio alarm, announcing the 6am news. I wake up.
I know that we all go through hard moments in our lives and I know how hard it can be to go over a heartbreak. And maybe I’m not the appropriate person to give lessons about it, but… I think that Adele needs help!
In 2011 she used to sing about a guy which broke her heart and how he’d found someone else and got married (see Someone like you lyrics). And now, four years later, she’s calling him again (see Hello lyrics) asking to meet him, her words soaked with tears.
Now either she’s talking about someone else (in which case she’s hopeless at dealing with liaisons) or she’s a dangerous stalker (poor guy, leave him alone!). Or, even worse, she’s only trying to stick to her eternal broken-hearted brand image.
Hey girl, listen to me, get out of this quicksand. Leave all this ridiculous melancholic sentimental sh*t to us fogeys. Go out with friends, have a few vodkas, meet other guys and enjoy. Please, Adele, it’s time to move on…
Never ask a woman “when is the baby due?” while pointing at her belly if you’re not TOTALLY SURE that she’s pregnant.
Being the wiser one most of the time means being the elder.
This is how I feel today…
If you’ve lost your password, I just found it in the corridor. Be more careful next time… 😀
OH. MY. GOD.
I find these wedding vows straight scary.
Looks like people think that loving someone is promising to never let him live a bit of his life free. NEVER.
This is not what loving someone should be, this looks more like a promise of damnation…
Much love ( the other one 😀 ),
I wanted to share with you one of my favorites quotes, hoping that I properly translated it…
“Fools dare anything. It’s the very way to pick them out, indeed…”
(“Les cons, ça ose tout. C’est même à ça qu’on les reconnait…” – Michel Audiard)